Hard to do...

I remember reading an article about breaking up where a therapist described the process as more difficult than morning the death of a loved one. With death, there is finality and the inability to contact the person that was lost. With the end of a relationship, most of the time, it is not due to the death of one of the parties involved, so the finality of the situation is more difficult to come to terms with.

To keep my mind off the youngin', I let my girlfriend take me out on the town on Friday night in NYC. We headed over to Earth NYC (www.earth-nyc.com) to have a few drinks in their "free vodka drinks" happy hour from 9 to 11pm. The crowd wasn't that great... very mixed and a little fobby, so we headed over to the old, reliable, Park (10th and 17th) next door. Probably not the best choice, as a tipsy me became a bit reminiscent of the day I met the youngin' there on the third floor, however The Park is easy to get into, my car was parked just around the corner, and we were inside in about two minutes, and had drinks in our hands in about 5 minutes. It was a pretty fun night, and my girlfriend seemed like she was having a fabulous time. We met quite a few boys and even let a few of them get us drinks or chat with us for a while before we continued wandering around, up and down the stairs. I had sobered up by 3am, so kissed my friend goodbye and headed home.

Cindy Chupak wrote in her book, Between Boyfriends, a short piece about a girl who was mourning the loss of her last relationship, and felt that if she went on a certain number of dates, she would be over her last relationship. In the end, it proved to not be true. Perhaps there is some truth in the "20 dates" theory, as post break-up I find myself in a well defined routine: going out with girlfriends to meet as many guys as possible, anxiously booking up my weekends with activities to keep me distracted, hitting the gym more than normal, writing more, reading more, cleaning more... and after a few weeks of that, things go back to the way they were before, just with no regular guy in the picture. I can't say that I wouldn't still miss them, but your heart comes to terms with the idea that if it was meant to be, it will be, and if it's not, there will be someone else. But of course, you just can't expect to meet the "someone else" tomorrow.